Survivorfest week 9!

Marty Farty hits the road!

Fresh from tribal council, NaOnka reveals that she thinks that Marty was too hard on Jane.  She couldn't believe that he was all up in her grill and stuff.  It's not like he threatened to rip off her prosthetic leg and throw it in the fire or something.  Sheesh.

Jane has officially dubbed Marty as Mr. Farty.  I think that really says it all.

Marty tried to rally the troops around a new plan of action:  Get Jane.  Really, that was about it.  Not much of a plan, really, just get her.  Get her good.

Jane thinks that he's just worried for his own safety in the game.  I had trouble following this metaphor "Marty's gotta noose around his neck waiting for the hatchet man to come cut the rope."  Um.  Wouldn't that be good news?  I know if I were hanging by a noose I'd want someone to come along and chop it...

The reward challenge was an obstacle course patterned after the Three Little Pigs.  One wall was made of straw, one of bamboo sticks and one of bricks. There were some obstacle courses to crawl through on the way to each wall. The first team through each wall and obstacle would collect keys to unlock a series of padlocks.  Winning team would get a zipline tour of Nicaragua and a barbecue.

They did a random draw and oddly the teams came out men versus women.  There was a collective slapping sound from the boardroom at CBS.  Just when I think they don't rig these things....

Chase was the odd man out.  He was given the opportunity to pick which team he thought would win and would join them on reward if he was correct.  He chose to side with the women.

The women held up pretty well through the straw wall.  The men took a distinct advantage at the bamboo wall, and it was all over but the shouting by the time they reached the brick wall.

Jane completely ran out of gas on the way to the brick wall.  Even if they had the time and the bulk to break through I suspect they would've had to carry her to the finish line.

Afterward the men were given the option to swap one of their team for one of the women who they thought "deserved' the trip.  That seemed kind of stupid.  I can't conceive of any reason why anyone on the team would willingly sit out the reward.  Plus, how would the team know who on the other team "deserved" to go when they were obviously too busy performing their own challenge to notice.  Makes no sense.

Needless to say, they declined.

Was Chase a fool for siding with the women for such a difficult challenge?  Of course not, because he was thinking with little Chase!  If the women won, he would enjoy reward with a bunch of women.  If they lost, he got to go back to camp, you guessed it, with a bunch of women!  Young, single men are trained to think this way. In many ways, he is a hero.

As always, too much of a good thing is rarely a good thing.  Back at camp Chase began to turn into a woman.  He kept asking Brenda about her feelings and wondered why they didn't talk any more...serious loss of man points.

At the reward, the men enjoyed the high altitude zipline.  Except Dan, who looked like he was ready to have a coranary.

At the barbecue Mr. Farty was back to his Get Jane plan.  I think if we put Marty on Breast Cancer Awareness we might have that stuff stamped out in a couple of months.

The Immunity Challenge was a memory game.  I figured this would appear in an old versus young season, but several weeks too late to do most of the oldies any good.  Probst showed a series of images in order and the players were to repeat them one at a time.

Jane and Nay washed out almost immediately when they couldn't remember their own names.  I think Nay knew, she just didn't want to be Probst's bitch.

Dan was out when he displayed an image that wasn't event included in the series.  I can only assume he didn't check it before he showed it.  He really should have been out three or four weeks ago.

The gang whittled down to Brenda and Marty.  Marty seemed to be keeping pace with some sort of Rainman routine.  Brenda had that memory thing that makes me think she doesn't forget ANYthing. Eventually Marty slipped up and Brenda won immunity.

Back at camp, the scheming began.  There were the usual obfuscations about who would be voting for whom.  This led to a wonderful exchange between Fabio and Benry, who were discussing how to "lay low" that week.

Fabio:  "I hate playing stupid so much.  But I guess that's the smart thing to do..."
Benry:  "It's easy!"

Marty went around spreading the word that Nay was going home so he could try to blindside Jane.  Really, Mr. Farty?  After the hissy fit you threw the night before, no one is buying it.

Marty told Brenda the Get Jane plan.  He also mentioned that it was Sash's idea.

Brenda asked Sash what his plan was and he said "my plan is whatever your plan is..."  I'm glad someone in this game is thinking.

Dan spent the whole day looking perpetually shocked by everything he saw and heard.  I suspect he was just amazed that he was still in the game.  I know I am.

At council, Probst asked about the whole stealing food thing.  NaOnka indicated that she wasn't there to talk about the past.  She declared herself a "humanitarian" which I believe she meant as an excuse for fallibility.  Or maybe she was just getting reallllllly hungry if you know what I mean.

Nay also mentioned her disgust of all things Marty.  His hair, his walk, the way he uses up oxygen.  It really digressed into f-bombs and fingers at that point. 

I think if NaOnka can survive this tribal council behaving like this, she's a sure-fire candidate for the final three.  She would literally have to murder someone at this point in order to get voted out.  And even then it might depend on who she killed.

The votes went in and Mr. Farty went out in a landslide.

Next week, NaOnka takes a dump in everyone's sleeping bags!  And still doesn't get voted out!